A Halloween Horror for the Modern Workplace

It was a dark and stormy Monday, the kind of Monday that already felt like punishment for existing. And then they arrived. Not in a puff of smoke or a swirl of capes, no, that would have been cool, this horror entered through Zoom.

The moment their name appeared in the waiting room, the temperature dropped ten degrees, someone’s Wi-Fi stuttered, and three cameras conveniently went dark.

The air filled with the unmistakable scent of overconfidence and jargon.

The Leader had logged in.

They began with their signature incantation: “Let’s circle back offline.” A phrase so ancient it’s practically carved into the walls of every corporate dungeon.

Their deck appeared, sixty-four freakin’ slides of beige torment, filled with charts that meant nothing and clip art that begged for release.

By slide seventeen, it was clear this was no ordinary leader.

They were an unholy fusion of every nightmare we’ve ever known: the Micromanager Mummy, wrapping every idea in red tape; the Ghost of Accountability, forever haunting projects but never lifting a finger; and the Werewolf of Urgency, appearing out of nowhere to bark, “This needed to be done yesterday!”

Every meeting became a feeding.

They devoured morale, innovation, and the faint spark of hope that occasionally flickered in your eyes. “Let’s be agile,” they declared, before scheduling four-hour status updates. “We’re like a family,” they said, right before firing the intern for daring to ask for a day off.

You tried Slack muting. You tried HR escalation. Nothing worked.

Then one brave soul, the new hire who hadn’t yet learned to fear, spoke up: “Maybe we should let the team lead this one?”

The silence was instant.

The Leader’s eyes narrowed but the dreaded smile remained on their lips.

The lights flickered.

The Wi-Fi died.

By morning, the new hire’s LinkedIn read: “Excited to announce I’m exploring new opportunities.”

If you’ve ever worked under this kind of leader, you know the chill.

The endless loop of meetings that lead nowhere, the praise that sounds like warning, the sense that you’re being slowly drained of both time and talent.

Leadership, real leadership, should not terrify.

It should amplify.

It should make people braver, sharper, freer, not quieter.

So this Halloween, maybe it’s time to banish the ghosts of bad management. Stop haunting your teams with vague directions and last-minute panic.

Stop feeding on their creativity to fuel your control. Leadership isn’t a horror story, unless you make it one.

And if you’re still using Comic Sans in your slides, then yes, maybe the haunting is deserved.